This is unusual...

A couple weeks ago, I woke to the sound of my alarm clock. This is not unusual. I then stumbled to the bathroom and sat upon the pot (mind you, this has nothing to do with going #2...it's just easier to pee that way when when you're coming to your senses at 6:00am). This is not unusual. I turned the water on, got it to just the right temperature, and then pulled the pin that dams the spout to redirect the water to the showerhead. This is not unusual. I disrobe, hurdle the side of the bathtub, and slowly back into the stream of water coming from above. This is not unusual. I stay there as long as it takes to feel human again letting the water run over me like a cathartic agent of cleansing. This is not unusual. I abruptly, almost angrily, turn the water off and grab a towel to dry my drenched carcass. This is not unusual. I step back out on dry land and look in the mirror for any sort of encouragement, I typically find my bearings as I stare at my lifeless frame. This is not unusual. I put on my tighty whiteys, then my deoderant, then my t-shirt. This is not unusual. I put gel in my hair and comb it straight back to let it harden ever so slightly while I brush my teeth. This is not unusual. I put on the rest of my clothes and make sure everything is in its place before I head off into the nightmorning) to meet my unsuspecting breakfast appointment. This is not unusual.

When I arrived at the coffee shop, I met with a good friend for a good long time talking life, God and random goings on. This is not unusual. After we were done, I had another appointment at the same place with the Leadership Team from Impact. Before we met I had to relieve myself of the affects of early morning caffine, so I waddled to the bathroom in the back of this quaint little cove in the heart of Lowell. This is definitely not unusual. I made my way to the toilet and did my business in a promp and cleanly manner. This is not unusual.

As I made my way to the sink to wash my hands (aren't I a good boy), I glanced up at the mirror and saw a shocking sight. I had forgotten to recomb my hair after dressing myself leaving it spiked up like Vanilla Ice from the late 80's. This is highly unusual. I couldn't believe that the guy (Jim Nora) I was meeting with let me sit there and talk to him for nearly two hours in serious conversation looking the way I did. He failed the test of honesty in friendship and was willing to let me carry on without so much as a hint that I looked like a peacock.

When I came out of the bathroom (laughing mind you), I asked the leadership team why they didn't say anything to me when they arrived. By this time, they were all laughing themselves to tears looking at the spectacle that was me. After about a half an hour into the meeting, I excused myself, went to the bathroom, and tried hard to reshape my hair into something that could be looked at without laughter. I emerged from the bathroom as a man that could once again be taken seriously.

The only thing funnier than this is that I did it once again this morning at Keiser's. I'm telling you, despite my record these last two weeks, this is highly unsual. I'm not joking...no seriously, it is...don't look at my like that, I'm not joshing you...come on...why won't you believe me? Oh, whatever you pompous punks, like you never do things like this on a regular basis. I'm telling you this was unusual and that's that.

For real.

Comments

Michelle said…
...you looked like a peacock? lol. You're right..that is highly unusual. Well, at least you noticed it before you got through the entire day. lol. I hope things are going well other than that. Hope you have a great week!

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